How To:

[The Mookington]

How To:

PvP.

This is a quick guide for anyone/everyone with a deficit of skill.

#1. Find an enemy.
#2. Set last target.
#3. Pick up keyboard.
#4. Roll your face across it.

Protip: be sure to hit the "magic arrow" macro many times, and periodically for no reason cast harm, weaken, clumsy, or feeblemind. These give the impression of skill, and will often force your opponent to flee.

#5. If target is still alive, repeat #4.

If by some chance you happen to die, immediately open http://www.uodemise.com/forum, click "General Discussion", click "New Thread", then title your thread "OMG". In the body of your message, describe what happened step by step, quoting numbers you couldnt possibly remember (i.e. HE HIT ME FOR 42 THEN I CASTED 7 MINI HEALS FOR 11, 12, 11, 10, 13, 11, and 12) while bending the tale to somehow make it seem like the opponent used one of the following: speedhacks, playuo, modded razor, gimp spells, gimp combos, gay combos, harm spam, MA spam, miniheal spam, ventrilo, teamspeak, KY Jelly Personal Lubricant, steroids, modded items, gay weapons, or too much brsk gear.

This is still a work in progress.. if anyone feels like adding to it, please leave a post in this thread and I will add what I see necessary to the guide.

Thank you.

 

[pbguy434]

Re: How To:

Way to bring Warlock references to UO.

 

[The Mookington]

Re: How To:

It was too easy. Besides, it also works with SPs and tree drood healing.

 

[stalker-demise]

Re: How To:

#6. If you run out of charges on your fukiya gun, under no circumstances should you continue the fight. Instead invis and recall back to your house to load your gun back up again. When you have added another 1289 charges onto your gun (enough for about one fight) recall back to brit mg and sit on the front of your house like a porchmonkey.

#6.a. If you happen to die while you have no charges left on your fukiya gun, hit capslock and say "NOOB! YOU ONLY KILL ME BECAUSE NO DARTS LEFT."

Thats all I got atm.

 

[Steven_Greer]

Re: How To:

6b) when fuyikaed at in return and have no cure pots left for using them all up and u die say omg u noob u fuyika dart noob! and walk away and bring 5000000 pots enough for a fight

 

[Hyuuga Neji]

Re: How To:

PvP.
while bending the tale to somehow make it seem like the opponent used one of the following: speedhacks, playuo, modded razor, gimp spells, gimp combos, gay combos, harm spam, MA spam, miniheal spam, ventrilo, teamspeak, KY Jelly Personal Lubricant, steroids, modded items, gay weapons, or too much brsk gear.

ahahahaha

 

[Emorian]

Re: How To:

holy shit the steroids part just cracked me hahhaha

 

[jrhather]

Re: How To:

Classic.

Added to my siggy =)

 

[Lucifall]

Re: How To:

lmao Mook, thats outstanding.

 

[The Mookington]

Re: How To:

Thanks. I try.

<3

 

[Krave]

Re: How To:

7) Always remember mention that you had very bad lag if you die. Cause it was only reason that you lost that fight.

 

[repiovesana]

Re: How To:

Even better than that. If you realize you're going to lose, just stop moving and casting. So you can stay still for a while, and after you die youstart moving again and say your client crashed during the fight. Or say you got distracted b/c your mom was talking to you.

 

[kev6872]

Re: How To:

PvP.
#3. Pick up keyboard.
#4. Roll your face across it.

holy shit I laughed my ass off when I read that. Great post.
Saddly this would prolly improve my pvp.

 

[TaxedSC]

Re: How To:

<removed>

 

[iDmajic]

Re: How To:

hahaha :]

 

[xaxas]

Re: How To:

Or say you got distracted b/c your mom was talking to you.

Naaah, thats lame. Say your *girlfriend* was talking to you. Or add some imagination and replace talking with something else...

 

[Buiu]

Re: How To:


or make a arhcery and use 3 keys to think that u r the leet pvp :< and say PWNED after u gank someone!

 

[repiovesana]

Re: How To:

Naaah, thats lame. Say your *girlfriend* was talking to you. Or add some imagination and replace talking with something else...

nah that would blow the whole "u suck" thing

 

[pbguy434]

Re: How To:

nah that would blow the whole "u suck" thing

No, Xaxas' was way better.

Kev, all he did was take the standard warlock dot joke and made it UO-esque.

 

[Nottheking]

Re: How To:

Naaah, thats lame. Say your *girlfriend* was talking to you. Or add some imagination and replace talking with something else...

LULZ. XD

'Course, we'd all know that it'd be a complete lie, as one of the few people capable of such things at the same time would be Chuck Norris. And Chuck Norris would've ****in' won the duel regardless.