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Chuck Norris...

Sundoom

Sundoom

Sorceror
Re: Chuck Norris...

Yankee Doodle went to town, riding on a lady, when Chuck Norris saw this act, he RoundHouse kicked the Yankee.

When Santa Clause caught a cold, Chuck Norris brought a toys to all the lil boys and girls.

When Jesus wasn't able to ressurect himself in the cave, Chuck Norris moved the rock and performed CPR to save Jesus's life.

Once upon a time, Virgin Merry, the mother of Jesus Christ, was shocked when she found out Chuck Norris was the the father.

(Reads a T-Shirt)

"I slept with Chuck Norris one night and all I got was this Million Dollar Bill"
 
Sundoom

Sundoom

Sorceror
Re: Chuck Norris...

I don't know how I remembered this, but...

Someone did a remix on Chuck Norris using a slow paced version of the Freakazoid opening theme on Kids WB way back. Anyone know where to find this song or even know the words?

Thanks if someone finds it.

The devil owns millions of people, but Chuck Norris owns him.
 
T

The Ritual

Wanderer
Re: Chuck Norris...

Chuck Norris doesn't die, death dies for him.

A car doesn't crash into Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris crashes into the Car.

Chuck Norris talked to god once, and god said, " Are you ready yet?"

Chuck Norris said," No but are you?"
 
ParagonDancer

ParagonDancer

Lord
Re: Chuck Norris...

Too long has this thread been sleeping.

In the original text of the bible John 3:16 translates: "For God so loved the world, he sent them his only begotten Chuck Norris."
 
H

Hypntick

Wanderer
Re: Chuck Norris...

Chuck norris once had sex in the cab of a semi-truck.
Some of the semen leaked into the engine, that truck is now known as optimus prime.
 
L

LeafsFan

Wanderer
Re: Chuck Norris...

-The Richter scale used to be called the "Chuck Norris scale" but was soon replaces as Chuck felt no earthquakes measured up to even one Chuck Norris.

-Behind Chuck Norris' beard isn't a chin....just another fist.

-Enjoy the Grand Canyon? Then thank Chuck Norris for roundhouse kicking it into existence.

-Jesus walked on water because Chuck Norris took his boat.

-The leading causes of death in the world are 1) Cancer 2) heart disease
3) Chuck Norris

- Chuck Norris is not technically a god, although he has been known to appear in toast in Mexico. And he does have over 1.2 billion worshippers world wide.

-
 
ParagonDancer

ParagonDancer

Lord
Re: Chuck Norris...

Once, Chuck Norris had sex in the back of a Transport Truck. Some of the semen leaked onto the engine. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
 
D

dxmfixation

Wanderer
Re: Chuck Norris...

I once bought a name change deed to change my character name to "ub3r1337h4xx0r" but when I hit submit, it had changed my name to Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris set up us the bomb!! What you say?
 
R

Rumplestiltskin

Sorceror
Re: Chuck Norris...

Chuck Norris knows the square root of -1.

Chuck Norris is the only thing that can escape a black hole.

Millions of dollars a year are spent on preventing Chuck Norris from sneezing, though he has sneezed once, they named it Katrina.

Chuck Norris once ate a bag of nails... and craped railroad spikes.

Chuck Norris suppliments his income by acting as a bomb shelter.

When Chuck Norris kicks something, it stays kicked.

Chuck Norris had to travel into the past to father himself, he was the only one who could.
 
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